Wednesday, November 2, 2011

the small.

The small has always had a hold on me, drawn me in.  I loved anything miniature as a child and let me tell you, as an adult, it is no different.  Give me my girls' miniature erasers, tiny little doll house sets, a barbie house to set up, a fairy house to create, and I am in my own paradise.  I love the small.

The small can become a world unto its own, a safe haven.

And so, these days, as life feels big, I crave the small.  Family issues, disagreement, big decisions loom.
  I want to feel small, safe, simple, uncomplicated.

As I crave this smallness, this blessed simplicity, I start to become hard on myself.  I begin to wonder.  Would that be running from challenges?  Could that mean playing it too safe?  Does God ask us to be small for him?  Or, is it that God asks us to be small so he can consume the space remaining?

And then, I remember a favorite passage of mine. 

The LORD said, “Go out and stand on the mountain in the presence of the LORD,
for the LORD is about to pass by.”
   Then a great and powerful wind tore the mountains apart and shattered the rocks before the LORD, but the LORD was not in the wind. After the wind there was an earthquake, but the LORD was not in the earthquake.
 After the earthquake came a fire, but the LORD was not in the fire.
And after the fire came a gentle whisper. When Elijah heard it, he pulled his cloak over his face and went out and stood at the mouth of the cave.

I remember that if I am too big, I won't hear the whisper, the whisper that breathes life and hope and feedom.  I decide it might be just what I need to become small in the ways God needs me to, because that smallness might be the only place I can hear his whisper.  And, I could use a really loud whisper from God right about now.

Reaching for his hem,

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